Playground Haiku

December Sunday.

Warm windy playground partners.

Watch me!  Catch me!  Fun.

One in a Million

Bill and I make a pretty good team.  We have different strengths and experiences, and as a result, we compliment each other.  We disagree, from time to time, on minor issues.  For example:  Is the Simpson's Halloween Special appropriate for a 3-year-old?  Does string cheese and chocolate milk make a nutritious breakfast?  Could the Bumbo double as a bath seat for a 4-month-old in the bathtub?  When trying to leave a toy store in the middle of the day, is it appropriate to try and convince your child that the store is 'closing'?  

Lately, we're trying to come up with creative ways to get Will to comply.  Bedtime has become one such issue.  Up until recently, we would announce 'bedtime' and Will would happily trot up the stairs for a bath, a book and bed.  Then all of a sudden, he began to whine and sulk and protest.  So Bill came up with an idea.  And I admit, there was a lot of eye-rolling and skepticism on my part.  This is what Bill told Will: "Lay down and try to go to sleep.  We'll come up in five minutes.  If you're not sleeping when we check on you, then you can come downstairs and play."  

Who would have thought that this actually works?  But it does.  Will has never called down from upstairs, asking for us to come check on him, and he doesn't complain nearly as much about going to bed.  And it's so simple.  He just falls asleep.  Here I was trying to explain to Will that he needed to get sleep in order to grow and get more energy.  Let me tell you, that just did not fly.  

Bill is a great dad.  He 'races' Will to see who can eat more broccoli first and he hums "Tom's Diner" to Liam when he's fussy.  He already knows how to transform all of the Transformers that Will got for Christmas (this is harder than it sounds) and he takes turns getting up early with the kids on days off.  He is one in a million.

Twas the Day After Christmas...

Okay, so I know it looks like we went overboard this Christmas.  But honestly, we just bought a lot of small things.  Organizing and finding a place for everything has become a true challenge.  The toys are taking over.  

We are still celebrating Christmas and visiting different family members over the next couple of days.  Once we've seen everyone, I promise a great post/synopsis.

Will has been thrilled with seeing family members and opening all of his gifts.  The only disappointment that I can recall was with the Optimus Prime slippers that Bill bent-over-backwards to find.  Will thought that slippers were soft shoes that allowed you to 'slip' (or skate really) all over the floors in our house.  After wearing them for about five seconds, he concluded that they 'didn't work' and he hasn't touched them since.  As for Liam, we recycled a lot of Will's old toys from when he was a baby.  We just unpacked them and wrapped them up.   Neither Will nor Liam seemed to mind.  We thought Will might notice, but he was just way too busy opening his own gifts to care.  

Hope you had a great Christmas!

Photographer in the Making

I bring my camera everywhere these days-- walks to school, grocery store, pediatrician, department store, playdate, bagel shop, family outings.  Where we go, it goes-- tossed in the diaper bag, crammed into my purse, stuffed into the front pocket of my ski jacket.  I consciously try not to be annoying or obsessive, but I am always taking pictures and I'm always trying to convince Will to "just hold still for one minute" and "please put your tongue in your mouth".  Lately, in order to get a few shots of Will, I must first make a bargain.  I get to take a few pictures, then Will gets to take a few pictures.  (Why is everything a negotiation these days?  I feel like I'm on some toddler version of 'Let's Make a Deal'.)  In any case, he's actually getting better at taking good photos.  Before long, I might be able to post some everyday shots of Liam and I courtesy of Will.  Here are some of Will's recent shots:

First Attempt

Best Shot (Ninth Attempt)

Self-Portrait

Three Christmas Miracles

(Between Christmas shopping, Christmas cookies, Christmas cards, Christmas parties, Christmas decorating, and Christmas art "pwojects", there hasn't been much time for posting new entries.  I have lots of pictures of various holiday events, however I'm saving them for a slideshow after Christmas.)

So back to this post...

A miracle is defined as an extremely outstanding or unusual event, thing, or accomplishment.  So here's a quick post regarding three recent miracles at our house.

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1:  Liam's Four Month Well Visit

Liam's recent well visit went well.  He's around the 50th percentile for height and weight and everything is going smoothly.  (I misplaced the sheet of paper on which I wrote his exact stats, so I'll have to come back and update this later.)  At the beginning of the visit, the doctor was asking me about milestones and whether Liam was rolling over yet.  I told him that although he is doing better on his tummy and holding his head up for longer periods of time, he hasn't rolled over yet.  Then, as I was backing away from the table so the doctor could start the exam, Liam decided to roll... nearly right off the table.  Dr. Lipp, who was closer, actually made the grab.  

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2:  Cara's Cookie Exchange

With teachers assigning final tests and quizzes before the upcoming holidays, my tutoring schedule has been very busy.  I had eight appointments last week and was out of the house on four different evenings.  I had committed to a holiday cookie exchange with some friends for Thursday morning.  Liam, who hasn't been napping much during the day, made it nearly impossible for me to bake during the day-- so I knew that I would have to wait until evening.  Since I was tutoring every night, I figured Wednesday would be as good as any other for the "big bake off".  Did I mention that besides Pilsbury pre-made cookie dough, I have never baked a cookie in my life?  I did manage to find a semi-homeade recipe, but I also needed to make 9 dozen cookies.  I started baking at about 10:30 pm and finished cleaning and packing everything up at about 3 am.  Yes, better time management is on my long, long list of new year's resolutions.

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3.  Will's Christmas Gift

Jinkies!  We got the last one!  There was only one set of Scooby Doo action figures left on the shelf at Toys R Us.  We were there at the right time and grabbed it, along with the Mystery Machine.  Will, who has always been facinated with 'spooky' things, can't get enough Scooby Doo-- and I really don't mind, because unlike Transformers or Max & Ruby, it's a show I actually enjoy watching.  Although we Santa got him a ton of gifts this year, I know that he's going to be so excited about this one.  

So how about you... any Christmas miracles at your house?

What? Why? When? Where? Who?

What was I thinking when I committed to a cookie exchange when I have tutoring every night this week and a teething baby attached to my hip during every waking hour?

Why am I on the computer when I should be writing out Christmas cards, doing laundry or hey, baking cookies?

When will I get motivated enough to eat right, exercise and finally fit into my pre-baby clothes?

Where can I find a temporary, decent-looking hairstyle that will allow me to grow out these funky layers?

Who wants to babysit on Friday night so Bill and I can finish our Christmas shopping?

Expecting the Unexpected

Last week, the weather here was just horrible.  Rainy, windy, cold, then warm, then cold again.  We spent the entire week indoors.  Finally, on Friday, the sun came out and despite the cold, it was a beautiful day.  I had (or so I thought) a great idea.  

We hadn't walked to or from school in over a week.  (The photo at left shows our walk on a nice day in September.) Every morning, Will would ask if we could walk and I would have to console him as I explained why we couldn't.  On Friday, I bundled up Liam and we headed to school to surprise Will with a walk home.  As I entered Will's classroom, he was sitting cross-legged on the floor, reading and waiting for me.  He jumped up and gave me a hug as Will's little friends circled Liam in his carrier.  (Liam is like a rockstar at Will's school.)  Will said goodbye to everyone as we put on his coat and headed outside.

"Where's the caaaaarrrrr?", he whined, as he saw the stroller parked next to the door.

"There's no car.  We're walking home, honey."  I could sense the impending drama.  Here it comes.

"Nooooooooooooo.  I don't want toooooo."

He spent the rest of the walk whining and complaining and begging me to pick him up and carry him.  I continued to push the stroller home, as fast as I could, all the while planning the fastest way to get Will into bed for a much needed nap.  Much needed... for me that is.

Fortunately, the "unexpected" works both ways.

In the past, I've always recruited Bill to accompany us for Christmas pictures.  From getting Will washed and dressed, to getting his cowlicks glued down, to getting him to smile and cooperate... I always thought about 'safety in numbers' and two against one is always safe, right?  This year, once again, it was two against one, but this time the odds were not in my favor.  Rather than wait two weeks for an evening appointment, I scheduled the photos for a morning when Bill was at work.  

I expected Will to be uncooperative and Liam to be fussy.  I expected Will to refuse to wear the sweater and I expected Liam to cry or spit up on his outfit.  I expected Will to make silly faces or break a prop and I expected that Liam would need a bottle or a diaper change as soon as it was time for our appointment to begin.  What I got was, of course, the unexpected.  Will was great.  He was completely agreeable (before, during and after) and the photographer commented on how wonderful he was.  Liam was happy and he delivered smile after smile, completely on cue.  For weeks, the anxiety of this appointment had been building and ultimately, it went off without a hitch.  Here are some of the photos... 

These days are filled with highs and lows, successes and failures... and almost always, the unexpected.

Photos from Will's Trip to NYC

Pee and Patience

Will has been diaper-free since August.  He's been sporting his Cars/Diego/Buzz/Thomas "big boy" underwear morning, noon and night.  In these last four months, we haven't had a single accident.  Not one.  That is, until today.

Both of my kids were sleeping this morning, as I prepared to take a quick shower.  Just as I was about to turn on the water, I heard Will calling me.  I suggested that he hop into my bed and watch television while I showered.  He hopped out of his bed, and into mine, as I was flipping through the kids' channels.  

"Mommy, your bed is wet."

I checked under the covers and realized that Will was soaked-- and so were my sheets and mattress cover.  I was shocked and struggled to be patient and reasonable.  I kept asking him, "Why?".... as if he would have some kind of rational explanation.  He didn't have much to say as I dragged him to the tub for a bath.

I got him dressed and checked on Liam, who was still sleeping, but beginning to stir.  I told Will that he would have to wait on his bed while I took my shower.  I lifted him onto the bed and suddenly realized that his bed was wet.  (I think it went something like this... "Aaaaaaaahh!")  I could feel my patience slipping away.  I realized that Will had actually wet his bed and then trucked his little wet butt across the hallway to do similar damage to mine.  (As if my basement isn't already full of laundry.)

"I'm not upset that you had an accident, but I'm upset that you didn't tell me.  Why didn't you tell me?  Why did you get into my bed if you were wet?"  Again, foolishly hoping for a rational explanation as I stripped his bed and realized that the urine soaked right through the cloth mattress cover.  By now I could hear Liam fussing as he was waking up.  Within minutes, he would be crying to be picked up, changed and fed.  I sat Will on the floor with a pile of books and headed into the bathroom.  I was determined to take that shower and hoping that a few minutes to myself might calm my growing frustration.

By the time I was finished with the shower, Liam was screaming.  I threw on some sweats, scooped him up and headed downstairs with Will.  Due to the screaming, I opted to feed him right away.  As he finished his bottle, I put him in his infant chair and ran upstairs to grab a set of the dirty sheets so that I could start the laundry-fest.  Then I was making coffee and chocolate milk and loading the dishwasher and starting breakfast...  Finally, I realized that I had forgotten to change Liam.

I picked Liam up, only to realize that his diaper had leaked up his back-- saturating his onesie, his pjs, and his chair.  

I guess good things aren't the only things that come in threes.  And that was only the first hour of my lovely day, which thankfully got much better.  

Lately, my new mantra is courtesy of Axl and circa 1989... "...little patience, mm yeah, mm yeah need a little patience, yeah just a little patience, yeah some more patience, yeah need some patience, yeah could use some patience, yeah gotta have some patience, yeah all it takes is patience, just a little patience is all you need"

Patience... and Lysol.

Economical vs Extravagant

Although my husband and I both earned degrees in mathematics, we are not financial wizards.  We signed a 4-year lease agreement on a truck, then used up the mileage allowance in two.  We spent way too much on our wedding, and much of the debt ended up on our credit cards.  Some of our less intelligent, extravagant decisions have included... 2 kayaks costing $2,000, 2 Devils season tickets totaling $1,800, and here's a good one...we bought a timeshare on our honeymoon.

Bill and I anticipated that surviving on one teacher's salary would be difficult.  We budgeted carefully throughout September, October and November.  We quit eating out and looked for things to do that were relatively inexpensive.  I had one or two tutoring jobs and I taught a 3-hour SAT course each week.  We were paying the bills and had just a little left over for incidentals.  We were being thrifty and smart and... economical.

Now, in December, we're really getting spoiled.  I had eight tutoring jobs last week, five today and I have five more scheduled for the coming week.  With all the extra money coming in, we're reverting to some bad habits and some excessive purchases.  

Friday Night

Extravagant:  Spending $15 on the light display at the Arts Center.  Bill and I think this display is getting smaller and smaller each year.  We also spent $10 at the 7-11 on hot chocolate and donuts.

Economical:  After the display, we found a deserted spot in the parking lot and Bill let Will drive.  Although Will enjoyed the light show, he loved sitting on Bill's lap and driving.  Cost: $0... or $1.55/gallon, which isn't too bad.

Saturday

Extravagant:  We bought tickets to see Disney on Ice at the Prudential Center.  Parking cost $20 and while there, we spent $36 on food and treats.  We also bought a plastic sword for $16.  The sword does not light up and now that we've gotten it home, it's causing all kinds of problems.

Economical:  Bill actually found the tickets on Ebay.   For the same price as the regular tickets, we got tickets to a private box.   And while other parents were spending $20 to get their kids a photo with a character,  we had Will sit on the floor next to the promotional posters (see above).

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Sunday

Just Economical:

Every year, we go to a local firehouse for a pancake breakfast and pictures with Santa.

For a total of $10.00, we got three complete breakfasts and all the photos with Santa that we could take.  Will preferred to stand, rather than sit on Santa's lap and he devoured the candy cane within minutes.  Did I mention that the candy cane was free?  Cha-ching!

New Rules

When I was in college, preparing to become a teacher, I took a course called, "Classroom Management".  This course was designed to prepare future teachers with different methods of classroom organization and discipline.  One of the suggestions offered in this class was a strategy that allowed students in the classroom to make their own rules.  For example, during the first week of class, a teacher would solicit suggestions for 'rules' from the students in the classroom.  The teacher might post these rules on the blackboard for discussion and then allow the students to select the best ones.  This idea always seemed impractical to me-- especially in the high school setting.  However, in raising a three-year-old, I decided to revisit this concept.  In raising a three-year-old, I'm willing to try just about anything these days.

Each morning at breakfast (as I struggle to get Will to stay seated and eat), we discuss the 'rules' that we are going to try and follow for the day.  He's familiar with the concept of rules from school and he seems to thrive on the concept.  For example, if Will is jumping on the couch and I tell him to get down, he may or may not respond to me.  However, if I remind him about the "rule" about jumping on the furniture, he'll hop off right away.  So weird.

This morning, at breakfast, I asked Will to tell me the rules he was going to follow for the day.  Below are Will's rules for today:

1)  No hitting.

2)  No yelling.

3)  Sit down while you eat.

4)  Don't open your belly.

5)  Don't jump and make toys fall on Liam.

6)  Don't rip up your napkin.

7)  Don't make the snowman melt.

8)  Don't say fresh things.

9)  Don't bang on the window.

10)  Don't break the Christmas tree.

Will came up with these on his own.  I'm not sure what #4 means... or #7... but we go with it anyway.  (Rule #6 comes from the fact that Will used to shred his napkin into a thousand tiny pieces-- driving mommy and daddy nuts.)  Surprisingly enough, making these rules each morning really does seem to set a tone for the day.  I make additional suggestions when necessary and Will usually agrees.  When he doesn't agree, we discuss it.

For example, tomorrow, new rules will be introduced based on the events of today.  Tomorrow we are instituting the new rule about not using Lincoln Logs to create catapults when Liam is also playing on the carpet.  (Use your imagination, it wasn't pretty.)

Three Years Ago

For those of you who don't already know, Will and Liam were born almost exactly three years apart.  Will was born on August 7th, 2005 and Liam was born on August 6th, 2008.  When I woke this morning, the significance of this day three years ago occurred to me almost immediately.

Three years ago, Will was nearly four months old and we had just spent the holiday weekend in Vermont.  It was a busy Monday morning, my first day back at work from maternity leave.  I woke up extra early, giving myself time to dress in 'real' clothes, blow-dry my hair, put on make-up and pack lunch.  I zipped my sleeping baby into his pram suit and headed out into the cold, dark morning.  I drove down the Parkway and transferred my still-sleeping baby into my mother's arms.  Back to the car and back to the Parkway, this time creeping north amongst the rush hour traffic.  I arrived at school and settled in as best as I could... trying to make copies and gather supplies within minutes of my first class.  I spent the day introducing myself to 5 new classes and trying to appear confident, balanced and dynamic.  The day was long and at its end, I was headed back down the Parkway to pick up Will and bring him home.  A few minutes from home, I recall looking up at the sky and realizing that it was already nearly dark.  I remember feeling exhausted and thinking about the tasks that lay ahead-- making dinner, cleaning up, spending quality time with Will, feeding and bathing and getting Will to sleep, planning for my next day of classes.  

I balanced being a mom and a teacher similarly for about two and a half years.  I was often tired and moody, my house was a mess and I frequently felt overwhelmed-- especially last year when I was pregnant with Liam.  Throughout those years, I pictured being a stay-at-home mom once our second child was born.  If we had been unable to make this work, I would have been headed to work this morning and juggling childcare arrangements for two children.

Three years later and I spent the day in jeans and sneakers.  My kids both woke up in their beds and we took the morning at a leisurely pace.  I had breakfast with Will and we talked about Christmas and the upcoming school day.  I fed Liam and listened to him babble as I helped Will get ready.  We all bundled up and walked to school.  I got to watch Will greet his friends and settle in with the activities laid out by the teachers.  I got to make small talk with other moms and spend time alone at home with Liam.  I got to do some cleaning and some organizing.  After picking Will up, I got to discuss the days events with Will while they were still fresh in his mind.  Once arriving home, I got to play in the backyard with Will and read him a few books before tucking him in for his nap.  While Will slept, I got to give Liam a bath and some tummy time.  I got to search recipes on-line and make a shopping list.  When Will woke up, I got to give him a big hug and carry him downstairs to play.  I got to spend the whole day at home.  (I did, however, spend the night tutoring-- trying to supplement our 'single-income'.) 

There are so many things I love about being home during the day.  It's not always perfect and it's not always easy (as you have read), but it's definitely gratifying.  Next year, I could be headed back to work, but this year, there's nowhere else I'd rather be.