One in a Million

Bill and I make a pretty good team.  We have different strengths and experiences, and as a result, we compliment each other.  We disagree, from time to time, on minor issues.  For example:  Is the Simpson's Halloween Special appropriate for a 3-year-old?  Does string cheese and chocolate milk make a nutritious breakfast?  Could the Bumbo double as a bath seat for a 4-month-old in the bathtub?  When trying to leave a toy store in the middle of the day, is it appropriate to try and convince your child that the store is 'closing'?  

Lately, we're trying to come up with creative ways to get Will to comply.  Bedtime has become one such issue.  Up until recently, we would announce 'bedtime' and Will would happily trot up the stairs for a bath, a book and bed.  Then all of a sudden, he began to whine and sulk and protest.  So Bill came up with an idea.  And I admit, there was a lot of eye-rolling and skepticism on my part.  This is what Bill told Will: "Lay down and try to go to sleep.  We'll come up in five minutes.  If you're not sleeping when we check on you, then you can come downstairs and play."  

Who would have thought that this actually works?  But it does.  Will has never called down from upstairs, asking for us to come check on him, and he doesn't complain nearly as much about going to bed.  And it's so simple.  He just falls asleep.  Here I was trying to explain to Will that he needed to get sleep in order to grow and get more energy.  Let me tell you, that just did not fly.  

Bill is a great dad.  He 'races' Will to see who can eat more broccoli first and he hums "Tom's Diner" to Liam when he's fussy.  He already knows how to transform all of the Transformers that Will got for Christmas (this is harder than it sounds) and he takes turns getting up early with the kids on days off.  He is one in a million.

New Rules

When I was in college, preparing to become a teacher, I took a course called, "Classroom Management".  This course was designed to prepare future teachers with different methods of classroom organization and discipline.  One of the suggestions offered in this class was a strategy that allowed students in the classroom to make their own rules.  For example, during the first week of class, a teacher would solicit suggestions for 'rules' from the students in the classroom.  The teacher might post these rules on the blackboard for discussion and then allow the students to select the best ones.  This idea always seemed impractical to me-- especially in the high school setting.  However, in raising a three-year-old, I decided to revisit this concept.  In raising a three-year-old, I'm willing to try just about anything these days.

Each morning at breakfast (as I struggle to get Will to stay seated and eat), we discuss the 'rules' that we are going to try and follow for the day.  He's familiar with the concept of rules from school and he seems to thrive on the concept.  For example, if Will is jumping on the couch and I tell him to get down, he may or may not respond to me.  However, if I remind him about the "rule" about jumping on the furniture, he'll hop off right away.  So weird.

This morning, at breakfast, I asked Will to tell me the rules he was going to follow for the day.  Below are Will's rules for today:

1)  No hitting.

2)  No yelling.

3)  Sit down while you eat.

4)  Don't open your belly.

5)  Don't jump and make toys fall on Liam.

6)  Don't rip up your napkin.

7)  Don't make the snowman melt.

8)  Don't say fresh things.

9)  Don't bang on the window.

10)  Don't break the Christmas tree.

Will came up with these on his own.  I'm not sure what #4 means... or #7... but we go with it anyway.  (Rule #6 comes from the fact that Will used to shred his napkin into a thousand tiny pieces-- driving mommy and daddy nuts.)  Surprisingly enough, making these rules each morning really does seem to set a tone for the day.  I make additional suggestions when necessary and Will usually agrees.  When he doesn't agree, we discuss it.

For example, tomorrow, new rules will be introduced based on the events of today.  Tomorrow we are instituting the new rule about not using Lincoln Logs to create catapults when Liam is also playing on the carpet.  (Use your imagination, it wasn't pretty.)